Wednesday, February 28, 2007

BACK IN BLACK.



Back after a short break to the banks of Mayo where a traditional Irish funeral had to be attended.

Poor old Granny C bailed out on us last week. Irish funerals are very strange and complicated; you spend 4 days mourning someone’s death while drinking so much that the family has to do a head count to see if anyone else had died from kidney failure. Death wish sessions.

It was really badly timed as well, the grannys funeral started in perfect unison with Ronan o Garas game commencing drop kick at Croke park last Saturday. My suggestion of wheeling in a plasma into the funeral home was gunned down by an angry female mob, gran would have been cool with it – she herself played no 8 for Castlebar rugby club back in the day.

The match itself was amazing. Yes there was a lot of controversy over “god shave the queen “ but thankfully it was respected. It would have made is out to be a nation of bigots and shit heads if we booed their nation anthem, the dignified silence showed what a lovely nation of sporting legends we have become.


Well apart from one or two muppets.

On the east bank of croke park a few English fans were chased by beer bottle swigging republicans who screamed at them to “ fuck off home and don’t be staling our potatoes and our wemon “ these tossers don’t even understand what it is that their protesting against, it’s a communal “ beat the brits “ club that they sign up to because the waiting list for Yoga classes is just to long.


Have a look at the picture above. This is the level of intelligence that was out in force last Saturday demanding the English leave our shores and take their “ foreign “ games with them …. Check his protest attire … LANGER.








Monday, February 19, 2007

Wednesday, February 14, 2007

HEROES













I got sent the first 4 episodes of the new TV smash “Hereo’s” which starts on March 1st on Channel 6 .

It’s fantastic, One of the most addictive shows I have every watched.

The P.R. company only sent out the first 4 episodes on disc which left me hanging for more !

This new drama has been compared to shows like Lost and 24 with its complex plots and focuses on the characters in the stories, watching them grow and develop.

In my opinion Lost is shite. The difference with this show is it gives you the ending in the first show - you know whats gonna happen.

Heroes is the story of a group of everyday people that soon discover that they have supernatural powers. There is a large cast of characters, including Hiro, a Japanese businessman with a penchant for comic books, Claire, that appears to be able to regenerate broken bones, cuts, and more, and Isaac, a young painter that can seem to tell the future while in a Heroin induced haze.
Starts Channel 6 March 1st.

Friday, February 09, 2007

BEER - Ya see we are not allowed to say that word on air in the mornings, so i suppose im just venting :-)























Poor Old Anna,

Well lets be honest she was tapped. Would you ( if you’re a saucy female type ) be willing to bed a 90 year old turtle for many years
In the hope of him some day kicking it and leaving you with 400 odd million ?



BEST OF THE ROOSTER TOMORROW SAT 10TH FEB:


Micheal Mee Cork Comedian joins us

Bridie Mary calls a male escort

Hot press people tackle touts

Larrys Chinese call

Why Irish men are quite in bed !

The Asda prank call.










Thursday, February 08, 2007

Wednesday, February 07, 2007

MUST SEE MOVIES !



The ultimate token of love?
























Valentines day is on the way , what you gonna get her ?

Over priced poxy cards that make kissy noises when you open them…. My arse !

A panic purchase bunch of battered red nettles from the back of a smokey hi ace van, because the rose shop is sold out ?? … My arse !

How about getting her a colonic irrigation?? ….. My … actually!

Yes that’s right, the rooster anal hygiene team have the ultimate love gesture for you to bag. Win one of two “ couple colonics “ with thanks
To the Sante clinic in middleton.

Relax in the comfortable surroundings of the Sante clinic, gowned up & hand in hand as Susan the suction specialist clears out that lingering
Intestinal toxicity, all courtesy of the Red Rooster show.

Thats love.

Tune in next week for more.

KC

Thursday, February 01, 2007

THE 7 WONDERS OF CORK......





























Some feen from Germany wants to find the " new 7 wonders of the world" and do away with the old one's, so we asked today what are your " cork 7 wonders "

Here are a short few suggestions.

Wat Abt d lil latched door above ur head in d ladies toilets in d Washington?... Where does it go?

Wil i fit thru d hole? Wil i try it? Its a real wonder...

Swing boats.

Pana man with the headphones

The frank & Walters

Lennoxs chipper

The High Bee Bar … looney house

Joe Dean

St finbarrs cathedral

Shandon Bells

Roy kean like

Blarney Castle

The feen in the denim shop

Berni Murphy

Irish Jack , the 5th member of “ the who “

The dole office has to be a wonder of cork half the population of cork has set up home in there! Elaine from blackrock

Potato pies are available and famous in youghal in doyle's chipper. From louise x

Potatoe Pies can also be gotten in Midleton in Ceohanes! Jaysus they’re Lovely and the Chips.... AH F**K SAKE LADS! CEOHANES MIDLETON, LOVELY GRUB! Denis,

Linehan sweet factory off shandon st.

My friend is from killdare she loves comming down here they cant get tanora up there an she loves it so is it a cork thing

Wat Abt those huge 2.5kg chocolate bars/Fukin bricks they sell in that chocolate store down french church street? Those r a bloody wonder. Hw Dya break em?!

The accent alone ìs a wonder.

Matty kielys chips. Legend. Steve. Fitzgerald park as well. Where else could ya score with some 1 ya did not want 2 be seen with

Tanora is a Cork wonder. Anybody from outside Cork at work has never heard of it

What about corrin cross over fermoy on da hill

Michael collins birth place just out side clon. from miss t. love the show

Definitely the breast in a bun. It's the sexiest thing in the world and the name too breasts and buns all in one! I spose i better say Shandon steeple too

The examiner man on Patrick’s street.